Master the Art of Conversation (Part 1 of 4)

Master the Art of Conversation (Part 1 of 4)


The art of conversation is quickly dying.
But instead of complaining about it, we’re going to do something about it. I honestly believe that the game I’m
going to teach you in this video will transform your life. I’m Alex Lyon and I’m here to provide
professional development tips, especially in the area of communication so that you
can increase your impact and lead your teams with more excellence. Today’s topic is a little more playful
than usual. I’m going to teach you something called the Conversation Game. The goals are simple, to keep the other
person talking. The rules are simple. If you’re talking,
you’re losing. You want to get the other person talking about 80% of
the time. Anything above 50% percent is good
here, but I would say your goal should be 80% of the time. So I’m going
to teach you 3 ways to “win” this conversation game. The first way is to ask the other people good simple questions. People cannot
resist talking about themselves. And you’re asking them about their interests,
about what they’ve been up to lately. You’re asking about their life. They’re
probably going to have something to say. Very high likelihood that they’ll want
to talk to you about that. So ask good simple, easy questions. Don’t put them on
the spot or asking anything too personal. And get them talking. And once the ball is rolling, tip number two, ask follow-up questions about what they just said. That means listening really
carefully to what they’re saying and instead of thinking about what you want
to say, you think about what you could ask. So, let’s say they were talking about
camping. Well then you ask them if they– a follow-up question–Do you have
any plans to camp this summer? That’s a follow-up. And then they talk
about their plans to camp this summer. Maybe you ask them something about the
gear that they use because they brought up that they sleep in a tent and not a
camper. Ask them about their gear and you keep this going. Everything they say
becomes fuel for the next follow-up question. And again, these questions should always
be easy, very straight forward to answer. Nothing too personal that’s going to put
them on the spot. The third tip is when it’s your turn to talk, speak
concisely and then get the conversation back on them. There may be times, for example, when they say, well how about you do you camp? And you answer it concisely and then get it
back on them. So you might say something like this. Yeah, I do. I enjoy camping. I like to go a
couple of times a year. Do you have any places that you would recommend? Boom. You see what happens there? You say, Yes, I did. You answer it concisely but then, again, you politely turn it back to them. You don’t want to be dismissive. They
shouldn’t feel like you’re playing a game and practicing. It should just feel
natural in this conversation. So whatever they’re saying you respond in a natural
but concise way and then you offer them another opportunity to speak by asking a
follow-up question. I would like you to literally practice this every day this
week. Pick somebody and play the Conversation Game. I’d also love to hear your comments and
your questions below about how it’s going. Or, maybe what are your tips to get the
other person talking about things they’re interested in. I firmly believe, and I’ve seen this
over years of teaching people how to do this, that the Conversation Game can
completely transform the way you engage in conversations with other people. So
I’m really excited for you to try this and report back and give your opinion. If
you’ve never subscribed to this channel, Communication Coach, I encourage you to do so, especially if you’re interested in ongoing content about communication and leadership. So, post a comment, subscribe, give a little thumbs up and let’s start
a conversation. Thanks. God bless and I hope that you use the Conversation Game very next opportunity.

4 thoughts on “Master the Art of Conversation (Part 1 of 4)”

  1. Why is the goal to keep the other person talking? Should we not be sharing our thoughts to contribute to the conversation as well?

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